Back by Popular Demand: Tobias' Po' Boy Masochist Extravaganza

[Tobias Lutz]

4. Stogies

This was an 8” from the PB III. It had some wrinkles in the wrapper and a ½” long split a little bit above the foot. There were a couple large veins and over all it had a very spongy feeling, though there were a few solid spots. I punched it and it gave a very loose draw. The wrapper itself began to unfurl two minutes into the smoke. I unwrapped it completely, exposing the binder and then rerolled the wrapper leaf, sealing it with spit in order to make it serviceable. This worked for about 4” of the cigar but then it began to fall apart and I had no choice but to put it out. In spite of the issues with the wrapper, as long as it held together this cigar gave a sharp and perfectly straight burn. Go figure.

It was actually disappointing that the construction was so bad on this one. It had some interesting flavors, some less pleasant than others but not completely repugnant. The first thing that came out was a taste that reminded me of the charred crust you get on the outside of your marshmallow when roasting it on the campfire. This eventually went away and was replaced by a flavor like weak coffee with hazelnut creamer in it. At one point immediately before the whole thing self-destructed it turned very sweet and sugary, almost like a Kuba Kuba.

Single best part of the cigar: Was the scorched marshmallow flavor at the beginning of the stick.

Single worst part of the cigar: I have never seen a cigar that was so poorly made. Were it not the sake of trying to review this stick I would have tossed it in the trash can 5 or 6 puffs in when the wrapper came completely off.

An overall rating on a scale of 1-10: 1.0 (If it doesn’t stay together for you to smoke it, any positive qualities a cigar may have are rendered moot.)

[Tobias Lutz]

14. Duque

This is what the website says about this fine 7” stick from the Po Boy II sampler…”Duque is mild in body and it sure beats a sharp stick in the eye. Pronounced ‘du-kay’.” For starters I’m glad they cleared up the pronunciation, though it is still too close to dookie for my comfort. Second, I don’t believe I’ve ever smoke a cigar that didn’t beat “a sharp stick in the eye”, so that doesn’t elicit much confidence from me either. The MSRP on these fine cigars is $200 for a bundle of 50, but you won’t pay that- no sir, you’ll only pay .99 per churchill for these beauties. Mine was inconsistently filled, soft down the length of the cigar with what appeared to be a filled foot. There was no visible damage to the wrapper and the cap stayed intact after punching it. The draw was pretty loose and tasted a little stale/bland.

This cigar gave off A LOT of smoke. I’m talking about LP smoke levels which I enjoyed very much. The flavors began as being woody and fairly mild. After a couple inches it shifted to something more like a toasted pita. Hardly a heavy profile, but actually pretty pleasant. The cigar eventually moved back to its woody beginnings, this time with a distinct taste of cedar. As has been the tendency with these .99 sticks, it unfortunately was unable to maintain its stellar performance all the way to the finish line. It morphed to something like an oily shop-rag which really was not doing it for me.

The single best part of the cigar: The amount of smoke it gave off was beautiful
The single worst part of the cigar: The final taste that it left in my mouth was disappointing and made me feel like the cigar had been carried around in my mechanics back pocket for several days.
Overall rating on a scale of 1-10: 6.7 (good burn, lots of smoke, taste was so close…but no cigar )

[Tobias Lutz]

24. Victor Sinclair Connecticut

Still in an 8” state of mind I plucked this one out the cooler because of how unique the wrapper color was. It was ugly on several levels, but mostly the wrapper had an overly yellowish shade for a Connecticut, as if the tobacco leaf had developed cirrhosis of the liver. There were wrinkles, precarious veins, and the cap looked as if my son had attached it with a glue stick. The cigar did feel firm all the way down its length. The band looked more like a coat of arms, and the foot smelled like plain ol’ cigar tobacco. The draw was very close to perfect- neither too tight, nor too loose. It tasted of light tobacco with a slightly woody tone.
This was a very mild stick, but even early on I discovered it had enough spice to make the back of my throat tickle a little bit. There was very little in the way of discernible flavors through the first half of the stick. There were however a few issues with the burn. No real tunneling, but the burn went askew close to an inch at one point when I stepped in with a torch to correct it. When it was finally going even I began picking up on a taste like burning notebook paper that eventually became woodier. The worst was near the end when every exhalation of smoke left a shellac like aftertaste in my mouth.

The single best part of the cigar: Hmmm. I guess I’ll go with the way it was packed fully with tobacco. I definitely got my .99 worth here
The single worst part of the cigar: Where to begin? The taste, or the appearance, or the burn? Pick one.
Overall rating on a scale of 1-10: 5.3 (I have smoke sticks that were worse in each area of evaluation, but this one managed to suck in a balanced, across the board way.)