Back by Popular Demand: Tobias' Po' Boy Masochist Extravaganza

[Tobias Lutz]

17. La Diferencia Cubana
This was a 7” churchill from the Po Boy II pack. It is available from CI in packs of 40 for $65, so this is not your bottom of the barrel .99 stick It had a light brown wrapper with some wrinkles down the length and on the side of the cap. There were two large veins but it was well filled with a solid foot and no soft-spots. The foot had an odor of tobacco and maple syrup. The punch exposed a tight draw with a slightly acidic tone as if it had been sprinkled with a bit of lemon juice.
I don’t have a whole lot to say about this cigar. It was quite unremarkable, both in regards to the good and the bad. The burn was fine, almost razor sharp through the first half when I began to slightly stray but it corrected itself. It had a very mild profile and tasted of tobacco and burning grass. Nothing spectacular, but void of anything to mock. It was on the mild side for my preference, but that is subjective. The flavors didn’t develop or morph along the way and you finished with the same reasonable and passé taste with which you began. If you smoke because you’re compelled to have something on fire hanging out your mouth and are satisfied by mild, uncomplicated flavors…let me introduce you to your dream cigar
The single best part of the cigar: There was nothing that rose notably above the rest
The single worst part of the cigar: There was nothing that stood out negatively against the other parts.
Overall rating on a scale of 1-10: 7.5 (I almost fell asleep while smoking it, but it was pleasantly absent of some of the characteristics that have jarred me from my boredom while smoking these budget sticks.)

[Tobias Lutz]

26. Cuban Delight
This 7” stick has interested me since I first unpacked the Po Boy II sampler. Firstly, the band caught my eye because the shade of green in the center is reminiscent of the paint in my grandmother’s house when I was growing up, and I dig anything that reminds me of my grandmother. Secondly, it advertises itself as a “Premium Cigar”. Always be wary of a stick that feels the need to promote itself as “premium”. Finally, it clearly says on the band “Export of Cuba”, even though the CI site states it is made in the DR. While total bs, I found this amusing. It was a medium brown stick with some wrinkles in the wrapped and a handful of moderately sized veins. The cap was a little shoddy and the foot was slightly damaged. It did however feel pretty full and the draw was moderately tight with “darker” flavors- slightly bitter and more robust.
This one started off rather bold with a strong medium profile and a fair amount of kick. There was faint leather and an oily nuttiness that came through early on. The smoke then settled down into a mild-medium place with woody flavors and remained as such through the duration of the cigar. The burn was decent and the flavors weren’t bad, but they certainly were not stellar. I’ve smoked a very limited number of habanos in my life, but I assure you that this was so far removed from what I expect when I light a CC that it wasn’t even funny. I actually read the CI reviews for this stick and most people seem to buy a flavored version rather than the Churchill. In the end I think it would have been better simply by being able to produce more smoke. It didn’t reward you with much quantity or quality wise.

The single best part of the cigar: The name/band/claim of origin. Amusing to say the least.
The single worst part of the cigar: The lack of smoke. You didn’t get much and so the flavors had to stand on their own (which was unfortunate).
Overall rating on a scale of 1-10: 6.8 (Nothing fantastic, but it gets the job done. Definitely NOT an export of Cuba )

[Tobias Lutz]

8. Fields of Gold
This was an 8” stick from the Po Boy III sampler. It felt firmly packed but the foot appeared to be partially hollow in the center. There were not any cracks, nor splits in the wrapper, but the cap was pretty shoddily constructed. It was cut very small and barely made it over the curvature of the head. There was one large vein down almost the entire length of the cigar. I punched it and it actually had a very good draw. Some might have considered it to be a little too tight, but I always suggest erring on the side of too tight rather than too loose. The stick gave a faint toasted almond flavor with the cold draw.

Immediately after lighting the cigar I noticed two things. First, there was an acidic taste to the smoke like when a vitamin C tab starts to dissolve on your tongue. Second, the initial several puffs tasted kind of soapy/perfumed, as if the roller had sweat some knockoff gardenia toilette spray on the binder. About halfway through the cigar it began to tunnel briefly which was accompanied by a very rough and acrid taste. This was the only burn issue with the cigar and it managed to correct itself so I wrote it off as any overly moist section. The remainder of the smoke shifted to a medium profile and had a woody tanginess to it. Like putting out your campfire with Countrytime lemonade.

The single best part of the cigar: Was the way it managed to correct itself from a ½” tunnel without me having to help it along.

The single worst part of the cigar: Was the flavor. It wasn’t like vomit aftertaste or anything, but if I got a taste like that from a carnival kissing booth- I’d take my money back from that bearded lady.

Overall rating on a scale of 1-10: 5.8 (ughhhh. The number speaks for itself.)

[Tobias Lutz]

18. Outlaw Big Game Fishing
This stick might win the award for most amusing name (best still goes to Hesitant Pirate). It is 8” of mediocrity from the Po Boy III sampler. The wrapper was a lighter brown with a couple of flaws. Most notably it was flaking up around the middle of the cigar. There was one large vein and several wrinkles down the length of the stick. It felt soft in sections and the foot showed an uneven fill. Most interestingly, the foot had both light and dark brown filler. It punched cleanly and gave a pretty loose draw that tasted like plain toast.

This one started out rather brash and caught me off guard. I have to admit that I hacked for a minute before I continued on. The beginning was slightly acrid/bitter, but this improved while the stick maintained its medium profile. It started to take on a woody, flowery taste that was hard to nail down but not at all unpleasant. Around a 1/3 of the way in the cigar began tunneling severely and I had to relight it with my torch. I believe it hit one of the tight spots in between all the loose pockets in the fill. The second half of the cigar had a milder flavor with a taste like strong unsweetened black tea. Unfortunately the wrapper began unfurling with a few inches left when I went to ash it out my car window. I tore a small section off and was able to get a few more Puffs but it continued to come undone until it could no longer be smoked.

The single best part of the cigar: That woody/cedarish/floral taste in the first half was pretty good.
The single worst part of the cigar: The way I couldn’t even finish it because it unfurled.
Overall rating on a scale of 1-10: 5.5 (It gets this score mainly for the flavors because construction and burn-wise, it left much to be desired.)

[Tobias Lutz]

27. Piloto Cubano
This was another 7” Churchill from the Po Boy II (which means it is available for box purchase folks!) It had a light Connecticut wrapper with just a couple small veins. It seemed to have solid construction with an even fill and a solid cap. I punched the cigar and it gave a pretty tight draw. It was slightly nutty and very mild. As a whole I thought it was pretty underwhelming.
This began with a slightly astringent taste that seemed sharp on my tongue. That settled don fairly quick and it became a rather passé mild profiled smoke. The burn was as close to perfect as any of these budget sticks had offered. At various points there was a “tanginess” that emerged from the cigar, but this was the most interesting aspect of the stick. In the end it was a solid smoke that would serve as a reliable yardgar, but my pants are still intact and I certainly was not memorably impressed.

The single best part of the cigar: The burn was as close to perfect as you can get.
The single worst part of the cigar: A one trick pony! It could be great, but it settles for good and uninteresting.
Overall rating on a scale of 1-10: 7.4 (It tasted decent and the burn was spot on)

[Tobias Lutz]

9. Don Smith Series Dee This was a 7” Churchill from the Po Boy II sampler. Slightly darker wrapper than most of the others in this set. It was firmly packed and the foot appeared completely filled. There were a couple thick, short veins and a the cap was questionable just like on the F.o.G. I smoked yesterday. It was cut unevenly and seemed to barely cover the head of the cigar. There was a ½” crack from the cap down the wrapper and a knick where a small piece of the wrapper was gone exposing the binder near the foot. The draw was very tight- almost to the stick’s detriment. On a side note- the band was amusingly long, wrapping almost completely around itself where it overlapped.

The stick began with an aged wood flavor. Sort of reminded me of an aging barrel used for alcohol. About a third of the way in I tasted pleather. That’s right, pleather. Plastic leather. Tasted like leather, but had nuances of “new plastic” to it, like when you open a cooler for the first time after buying it. Very strange, but only moderately repulsive. This went away at the halfway point and then the cigar was really quite boring the rest of the way. It did have a surprising creaminess to its passé mild tobacco flavor which made it more enjoyable.

The single best part of the cigar: The creaminess of the smoke in the second half of the cigar.
The single worst part of the cigar: Pleather. It was like having Freddy Mercury’s pants shoved in my mouth. Fortunately it was over quickly.
Overall rating on a scale of 1-10: 6.5 (The burn was decent, the flavors didn’t make me sick, nor was it wasn’t squishy and under-filled.)

[Tobias Lutz]

19. Sacuba Cigars
This was an 8” from sampler #3 . It had a darker brown wrapper without any obvious construction issues. No large veins, nicks, or wrinkles. It felt a little on the soft side but the foot was moderately full. The cigar smelled “old”. By this I mean like a stack of dusty hardcover books that have been sitting around for quite a while. The cap cracked slightly when it was punched, but the draw was fairly tight. There was a slight hint of sweetness but no real taste to speak of.

The cigar began with a pleasant medium bodied profile that was devoid of any pronounced flavor. After an inch or so I began to pick up a moderately strong wood flavor but alas it never garnered much traction and it disappeared fairly quickly. Similar to a few other sticks so far in this experiment, this cigar was basically a one trick pony through the long haul. Nothing really came alive taste wise to catch my attention down to the nub. It burned well, never requiring correction. This was a very milquetoast smoke that had me questioning whether I like some of the horrible cigars more if for no other reason than they entertained me when I smoked them. This lust laid there like an inflatable friend that can’t requite your interest.

The single best part of the cigar: The medium profile was a nice change of pace from some of the very mild cigars in the sampler.
The single worst part of the cigar: The way it never really tasted like much of anything (except for the 5 puffs where it tasted woody in the early going)
Overall rating on a scale of 1-10: 6.3 (I can’t complain about the way it smoked or the flavors (because it didn’t have any! This would be a good smoke if you ever lose your sense of taste with a cold.)

[Tobias Lutz]

28. Joya del Jefe
Back with another 7” wonder from the Po Boy II. It had a light wrapper with small veins all the way down its length. It had an even fill and a pretty solid looking foot. The cap was great and it didn’t have any knicks or splits in it. I punched it and was really surprised to find out loose the draw was for a cigar that felt so firm. There weren’t any notable flavors on the cold draw, but it did have a faint sweetness about it. I don’t know if I’ve just become desensitized to crap, but this cigar looked pretty nice to me. {hangsheadinshameforsayingthatoutloud}

This one began with much promise and similar to my aspirations in life, spiraled downward until it reached the equivalent of “sad man writing online reviews of crappy cigars for free” It had a medium body and wisps of cedar came through early in the stick. The burn was good and it produced a very nice quantity of smoke (not like a Papa Fritas, but getting there.) There was a bit of spice in the retrohale but nothing overwhelming. Towards the second third of the stick I got the taste of black walnuts (particularly the mild bitterness), and then a fragrant taste like black walnuts in a 1-800-FLOWERS arrangement. Alas however, it had peaked. Before too long it tasted like nothing more than an old wet shoe and before I could get into the final third the wrapper began to unfurl and attempted to shed itself when I ashed out the car window. It tried so hard- close…but no cigar.

The single best part of the cigar: The amount of smoke was a pleasant chage as most Po Boys have been stingy in that regard.
The single worst part of the cigar: The flavor that seemed like someone dug up a pair of Voits that I was wearing back in the early 90s, dipped them in the tub and shoved them into my mouth.
Overall rating on a scale of 1-10: 5.3 (Not only did the flavor turn on me like a lady of the night when she realizes you were going to try and pay with your debit card, but then the stick just feel apart in my hand)

[Tobias Lutz]

10. Victor Sinclair This was a 7” stick from the Po Boy II selection. The wrapper was much light than they have been coming lately so that was a little change of pace. Beyond the color it looked like Frankenstein’s cigar. The wrapper was wrinkled in several places with odd folds near the head. The cap looked as if it were torn from the leaf and gluesticked haphazardly on. It looked as if a first-timer rolled this one. It was soft with fill gaps that could be felt through the wrapper. I could easily use my thumb and forefinger to form it into a box-press shape.

When I punched the cigar the head split about ½” down the side. The draw was surprisingly tight and I discovered that was from a knot of tobacco under the band. The intial light was spicy and peppery. I was kind of surprised to get such a profile right off the bat. It settled down rather quickly into a kind of woody taste. The burn was horrible, sometimes going almost an inch astray before I would give in and correct it. The stick did have a nice earthiness that was void of the chemical overtones I have been picking up in other Po Boy cigars. Near the end of the stick the cap actually came off in my mouth and I said “to hell with it” and chucked it onto the interstate.

The single best part of the cigar: The flavor. It really wasn’t too bad and it was quite good at the very beginning.
The single worst part of the cigar: The burn. It was as queer as a football bat and never recovered on its own.
Overall rating on a scale of 1-10: 5.8 (This was a book that I should have judged by its cover.)

[Tobias Lutz]

20. Bandolera Wanted
This was an interesting looking 8” stick from the Po Boy III set that had an angry looking Mexican gentleman, sombrero and all smoking a cigar on the band. It had a darker wrapper with quite a few small veins, but no construction issues. It was nicely rolled without any soft spots. The foot was completely full and the cap blended well into the body of the cigar. I punched it and it had a decent draw with a mellow profile like fresh baked bread.
This stick was surprisingly abrasive from the first couple puffs. It was definitely a medium profile stick, but without any finesse in how it delivered itself. The flavors were a bit acrid and unpleasant. I’m not opposed to peppery cigars, but I like the pepper flavor to be “clean” and defined. This vacillated between woody, peppery, and some other strong tastes that I had a hard time defining, but without marrying them together. It was like the crude brute force of a street brawl as opposed to the artistry of a well trained boxer in the ring. Both are examples of violence, but one is by far more palatable because it is orchestrated well. In the end, the entire cigar smoked like a nub (not the brand, but the portion of a stick). It seemed to be a jumbled collective that never hit on much of anything.

The single best part of the cigar: Construction. Nice looking, great burn.
The single worst part of the cigar: The horrible blending, though I would be somewhat interested to see what it tasted like with a year on it.
Overall rating on a scale of 1-10: 5.9 (Words like crude, offensive, and unrefined come immediately to mind with I think of the flavors.