Back by Popular Demand: Tobias' Po' Boy Masochist Extravaganza

[Tobias Lutz]

21. Bonita Momma
An 8” Churchill from the Po Boy II collection, this one had a very amusing band. The was a woman wearing an Egyptian headdress with pyramids and monoliths in the background, and on the back it promised “One mother of a cigar” The wrapper was medium brown without any large veins. The cap was pretty shabby, and was flaking prior to being punched. The fill felt “hit or miss” with some areas soft, but others feeling like knots (particularly near the head). It had a very mild tobacco scent and after punching it I discovered a moderately strong cedar flavor. The draw was tight, which I think was a result of the “knots” near the cap.
The cigar started off with sweetness in the smoke, but a bitter taste coming from the wrapper (cap). The hints of cedar from the cold draw were perceptible early on. The draw remained hard for the duration of the smoke. It was tight enough to make it seem like work to keep it lit in a couple spots even though it burned evenly all the way down. At certain points the mild-medium profile was laced with an acidic taste. In the retrohale it was almost like the tobacco had been soaked in vinegar. When this passed however, it was replaced with a nice flavor that included hints of leather. Pretty much a mixed bag as it went along.

The single best part of the cigar: A tie between the hilarious band, and the amount of cedar you could pick up on. Very nice in a cheap stick.
The single worst part of the cigar: Feeling like I was trying to suck a golf ball through a straw because it was unevenly filled.
Overall rating on a scale of 1-10: 6.0 (Kind of like Kenny Loggins’ career, it had its high notes, but they were intermingled with crap and ridiculousness)

[Tobias Lutz]

30. Victor Sinclair Primeros Tabacos
I saved what looked to be one of the highest quality smokes in the samplers for last. This is technically one of the “high dollar” ‘gars in the mix because it typically sells for a little over $3 per stick when purchased in a fiver. It was the final 7” stick from the Po Boy II selection and had a light to medium brown Connecticut wrapper. There were a few small veins, the cap looked good and the wrapper laid down well without any wrinkles or lifting up. It felt like a full stick- it was firm down the length and had a nicely packed foot. It smelled like toasted tobacco with almost a caramel overtone. It punched cleanly and the draw was firm with a slight nuttiness.

I was pretty disappointed at the start of the cigar because it had a salty/tangy nuance to the flavor that just seemed off. This only lasted for several puffs before disappearing, but it was not a good first impression. From there it moved on to a grassy, then lightly woody mild profile smoke. It held its own as far as burn throughout the stick, requiring no corrections and holding its ash rather stiffly. About two thirds of the way through it became a little acrid and started to resemble a dirty ashtray. I purged it twice and it recovered fine. The final section had a stronger sweetness and some spicy notes in the retrohale. It was a surprisingly fast smoke for a Churchill at only 90 minutes. Typically 2 hours of fun can be had with a 7” stick (at least that’s what she said.)

The single best part of the cigar: Nice looking, no construction flaws and a classy band
The single worst part of the cigar: The start was rough- close to being an ammonia experience.
Overall rating on a scale of 1-10: 7.4 (I wouldn’t pay $3 for one, but thrown in at .99, it did well for itself.)

And so it ends…
The experiment goes out quietly, rather than with a bang. I’ll be getting together to herf with a BOTL up the highway on Friday, and I’m sure we’ll smoke something decent to get the el cheapo taste out my mouth. I could probably scrub through a bar of soap in the shower till the water ran ice cold and still not be able to feel clean after doing this. I think I found a couple sticks that would suffice for the smoker who just wants something lit on fire hanging out their mouth while they fish/mow/work on the car. I also was able to mark a few land mines before anyone skipped ignorantly upon them.

“They who go feel not the pain of parting; it is they who stay behind that suffer.”
Henry Wadsworth Longfellow